It's Monday again, and I'm at my vanilla job, writing a blog instead of doing what I'm supposed to be doing (but looking very much like I'm working, since my fingers are flying across the keyboard, and my face looks concentrated and concerned).
I don't want to be here really - I want to be at home with my stupid dog, so he isn't anxious and scared without me, and so he can go for three long walks a day instead of one short one and a medium length jog. I want to be at the gym because my DOMs from last week is gone and I have goals to achieve. I want to be reading my new book of poems, Rupi Kaur's The Sun and Her Flowers. I want to be cleaning my fur-filled house. I want to be doing the washing I forgot to do over the weekend. I want to be taking midday naps at my leisure. I want to be catching up on Netflix and planning my move at the end of the year. I want to be taking the time to brush all of my hair. I want to be cooking something awesome instead of rushing through it when I'm tired and useless. I also want to be eating that cooking. I want to be booking with clients and taking the time to work on my image, marketing, advertisements, and content.
But alas, I have this pesky full time job so I can pay my bills and pretend to my parents that I'm gainfully and respectably employed, instead of gainfully and respectably a sex worker. I like my job, I do, but I feel there are so many things I could be doing at home that are more fruitful and fulfilling than providing income for a corporate machine. Naps are pretty fruitful. I'm pretty lucky that I have this job, and lucky for the extra income it provides, but damn, it really drains me!
How do you recharge at the end of the day to get things done for yourself?
I mean, I have ME, so sometimes I'll go home, take the pup for a walk, and then sleep from 6pm until 7am and not be able to do anything useful at all, but some motivation would be super helpful!
Playlists, aromatherapy, snack suggestions etc all welcome!
"Start where you are,
Use what you have,
Do what you can."